Friday 24 October 2014

#SwachhBharat Abhiyan

I hail the Indian government’s Swachh Bharat Abhiyan (Clean India Campaign). The campaign is in good direction and the movement is in good direction. Nevertheless, for results, ‘#SwachhBharat’ has to be accountability-oriented and process-driven.

A campaign can bring more awareness and perhaps more support among the Indian public; but, cannot produce results until the battle is process driven.

Accountability:-
  1. A central governance committee to be setup and responsible to complete the mission by 2019
  2. Make the District collectors accountable for their districts
  3. Let there be yearly (or) half-yearly reports on the progress – district level and rolled up to state/national level and published by the central governance committee
Process:-
  1. Let there be a common process (or) a customized process for every district to make/keep the district clean
  2. The process to highlight the difficulties and escalate the hardships - along with the possible solutions - immediately (perhaps in a common forum) for the central governance to take action
Let the government do the monumental task, taking in my ideas (or) not! For me, as an individual, I am going to start today, as I write this blog, to actively participate in the campaign. My goals
  1. My Home – this weekend
  2. My Housing Society – 31st December, 2014
  3. The streets around the Housing Society - 31st March, 2015
  4. Sector 14, Kharghar, Navi Mumbai – 31st December 2015
If I can achieve a clean neighbourhood by the end of next year, I can then pass on the processes, hardships and solutions of the #SwachhBharat drive, to the local administration.

Ladies and Gentlemen, please expect an update to this post on the mentioned date(s) and lets all build a ‘Clean Nation’.

A note of caution: - What we are talking about here is changing century old behaviour of a common man in India, when it comes to public sanitation and cleanliness. It is going to be challenging, slow and a monumental task! Let there be a dustbin in every street in India! Let the force be with us! Jai Hind!

Friday 17 October 2014

Diwali wishes from ABC Software!

Welcome to ABC Software! As with many things in life, the tenure with ABC is what one makes of it! We have had several unique personas with distinct idiosyncrasies having worked/still working for ABC. Then there was (is) he/she, who

·         Manages the Managers
·         Follows the law : ‘For every action there is an equivalent and opposite inaction’
·         Communicates only one-way
·         Sets up processes to set new policies from already set policies
·         Talks to only ‘n’ ABCians where ‘n’ equals to the number of years spent at ABC
·         Writes poems even for official communication
·         Would not read anything other than Software code for more than 15 seconds
·         Likes to meet (or) should we say, ‘likes Meetings’
·         Picks nicknames to go trendy with latest technology
·         Practices clothing style like late eighties; grooming style like late nineties and constantly wishes to be in late twenties
·         Has unique patent-pending algorithm in picking up colour and style of the outfit, for the day
·         Wrestles the way through to top title in most of the games
·         Looks at software systems only as subsystems
·         Believes ‘Marketing’ lies with    well...
·         Does not spell names Sebisfically Karrectly!
·         Talks only in numbers (or) should we say numbers the ‘Talks’ that are made in a day
·         Measures the smile and if gets flashy, immediately frowns
·         Works hard creating something funny and often times creates funny work
·         Practices the art of conversing in one syllables even for official communication
           An example excerpt:
Q: There is a bug in the system, XYZ.
A: O!
Q: Can you fix it?
A: Y?
Q: Who coded that?
A: I.
Q:  Can you fix it?
A: S.
Q: Where is your Team Leader?
A: T.
Q: I will tell your TL that you fixing the bug.
A: K.
·         Defies science with Decibel level – High
·         Defies science with Decibel level – Low

Welcome to ABC Software! You will be fine!

Wednesday 1 October 2014

Amma released statement from Jail!

If I were the political advisor of Amma, I would recommend the following statement be released immediately by Amma:

"My dear countrymen, I would like to announce to the entire nation that I take complete responsibility for the current legal situation. It is up to me to fight against the hardship and come out clean, unaffected by the challenges, that are posed against me. Thank you for your overwhelming support, during the difficult times. Having said that, I want the following activities be stopped at once in our state.

1.       No protest, in whatsoever form.
2.       No statements in my support, in whatsoever form.

If anybody does one of the above two or both, they are NOT going to enter in my good books. Rather they would end up in my bad books. I appeal to the police department to take strictest action against anyone who breaks the law and cause trouble to the general public and normal life in the state, under the excuse of supporting me.

Until after the legal situation is resolved, in the eyes of the rest of the world, your leader is beheld as corrupt. To some of them your leader is beheld as criminal. I respect their opinion and they are totally entitled to the opinion; I appeal to all my supporters not to display any advertisement projecting me as ‘Dharma Amma, ‘Can GOD be punished?’ etc., It would purely be nauseating to them and would be outright comical to the rest of the world.

Jaya TV to stop broadcasting all the nonsense about 60 people committing suicide to protest against my arrest. It is highly of very bad taste and wrong precedent. It is downright embarrassing when political critics call me and ask ‘Why none of your council of ministers, who cried so profoundly during oath-taking ceremony, haven’t had cardiac arrests?’

I want to reiterate to my supporters that your leader is much taller and too big in stature for a legal situation like this to affect in any significant manner. Also, I would like to reiterate to my countrymen that my agenda for the welfare of the state is vast and I would not go down easily and fight till the very end towards my goal of betterment for the people that immensely have faith in me. In power or not, I would continue to work towards the betterment of my state and would not tolerate any harm done towards my people – physical or emotional, especially under the excuse of supporting me. Jai Hind!"

Sunday 10 August 2014

Bloody Fear!

In the Indian sub continent, anything bloody is considered an expletive: an inappropriate thing to say. However, the write-up involves Blood and fear induced by blood. I cannot possibly choose a better title than ‘Bloody fear’!

I want to tell you something! ‘Bloody’, the adjective is not an expletive. It just means, ‘with blood’ or ‘full of blood’ or ‘lot of blood’. Furthermore, the narration is about blood and fear – outside of Indian subcontinent. On that bloody intro, let us get on with the story.

The year was 2000. I lived and worked in the United States of America. The city of Bentonville is an unassuming small town in Arkansas, with all the characteristics that qualify for something ends with ‘Ville’.

My apartments had 18 holes among other things. During weekends, I used to just stand in the balcony of my home – smoking and watching lazy golfers putting around. The game of golf never intrigued me as much as Tennis or Football (for Americans, it is ‘soccer’ or simply FIFA)

The laziness or the smoking never bothered me during those years until I found it. Blood. Initially, there was a trace of it when I goggled after smoking a cigarette. Then I noticed blood every time I had a mouthwash, smoking or not.

Having severely influenced by the Tamil movies I had watched as an young adult, I sported a beard and started coughing. Everyday I used to practice cool philosophical things to say about life, for my restaurant/bar time dinner chat.

As days passed by, I grew tired of waiting to die. After a week, I wanted to turn the things around, and stopped smoking. Well. Not completely; just one cigarette a day.  I even had a clean shave and started to smile more and talk less philosophically. Nothing helped.

After two weeks, I decided to visit a doctor. The doctor advised a series of medical examinations: an X-RAY, ECG and ironically a blood test too and also a few more tests (which are not common names as ECG, X-RAY or a blood test)

The lab technicians sent reports back to the doctor declaring me having a ‘clean bill of health’. The only suggestion in their reports was for me to have a couple of sessions of therapy, to straighten my thoughts out. Apparently, Tamil movie cancer philosophy crept into the conversations during medical tests.

With the test results, the doctor called me back. After briefing the results from the reports, the doctor had only one thing to say: Go, see a dentist! Well. You guessed it right. The dentist fixed my weak bleeding gums and helped me improve oral hygiene practices. Voila! Or Bingo! The blood stopped.

I have to tell you. The feel of normal life again was extremely boring and not cool at all; I needed that blood. I needed that beard. I needed that philosophical air about me. Nevertheless, I called the doctor and informed about my bleeding gums. Over the phone, he laughed out loud. I sighed and was about to hang up and then he asked me the question: ‘Raj, say - when do you smoke that one cigarette?’

Friday 8 August 2014

Resume Writing!

Alright Ladies and Gentlemen,

I am going to touch upon a topic and make it easy for everyone involved – Working men and women. That is almost 60% of the world’s population. One time or the other in our working life, we ought to type out a resume.

I have known a lot of people who have worked for one single company in their entire life just on the fear for typing out a resume. Ironically, some of the aforementioned people have worked in the companies, who make money teaching the world ‘How to write successful Resumes’.

My Mantra on Resume Writing has 3 simple rules:-

Rule No 1 – Do not pay someone to write your resume!
Rule No 2 – Do not spend more than 1 hour to write your resume!
Rule No 3 – Do not make the resume exceed one page of A4 size paper!

Want an example? Please check this out:

RAJAVEL THIRUVU
9947084620

Education
MCA, NIT Trichy, Tamilnadu
National Merit Scholarship and Dept of Electronics (Government of India) Scholarship

Current Title
Delivery Manager – Middle Management

Title Looking for
Upper Middle / Top Management

Project History
1994 – 1997 – Tata Unisys Ltd. - INDIA, USA, CANADA
Projects in Banking, Legacy to PC, IVR

1997 – 2003 – Wal-Mart Stores Inc. – USA
Projects in Retail, NT Admin

2003 – 2005 – TonePoint Inc. - USA
Projects in Games, Game Tools

2006 – 2008 – Exilant Consulting Pvt Ltd. – INDIA
Projects for Apple Inc. IT

2008 – 2009 - iAssure Info Solutions Pvt Ltd. – INDIA
Projects in Insurance, Aviation, Hospitality

2009 – Current – Gemini Software Solutions Pvt Ltd. – INDIA
Projects in Shipping, Banking, Business Intelligence

Passion
Writing Articles
Puzzle solving (Running an email group forum called Puzzle-IT!)
Team building

If you are thinking an important part is missing in the resume, you are right. Where are the salary details? Guys, it is all in the QRCode! Cheers! 

Monday 19 May 2014

Rahul Gandhi interview with Arnab Goswami

Ladies and Gentlemen readers, firstly I would like to declare that I am not a Congressman. Also, I do not write about politics. However, after seeing the interview of Rahul Gandhi with Arnab Goswami in YouTube and after reading thru the newspapers and columns in internet, I wanted to take time off and write about the interview and what, in my opinion, is the right perspective to analyze the interview. More importantly, what is the right message to take away from the interview.

The reviews were very sad. Almost all the reviews, some from eminent columnists, were trying to depict that Rahul did not get what Arnab was saying and repeated himself. On the contrary, it was Arnab who did not get what Rahul was saying and it was Arnab who repeated the questions which, in my opinion, when answered will only be of interest to masala movie-goers. Rahul avoided them. In fact, so subtly he had tried to explain to Arnab, ‘let us try and talk about important things’.

During the final minutes, a frustrated Rahul openly condemned that Arnab is not interested in talking about serious issues that Rahul wanted to talk about. The reply from Arnab – lamest excuse possible: ‘If I want to talk about them, I would be listening to a Rahul Gandhi speech. But, this is a Rahul Gandhi interview’.

What it really means – we, the media (channels and newspapers), are not interested in how you are planning to run this country and what are the changes you plan to bring about to the system? Rather we just want to know your answer on ‘Modi calling you a ‘Prince’’. Rahul is not going to answer these questions. He is much bigger than that. And certainly Rahul is not going to be dragged into sensitive and unfortunate riots (and sadly, sensational for the channels even after years have passed) and scams and arrests. He is not game for talking about anything Past. Learning from the Past is as far he would go. From what I could see: Rahul is present. Rahul is future.

Take the single-most important thing from Rahul’s interview! If you listen carefully, he mentioned critical things about how India is run. India is run by policies and laws made by elected representatives. He challenged, read carefully here – even his own party’s procedures, about how we select our candidates who contest elections. Is it not crux of the whole thing? SELECT RIGHT CANDIDATES! Send them to parliament! They make the right policies and laws. They do not involve in scams. The system changes!

After what had happened in the parliament over Telangana row recently, after seeing corrupt politicians arrested, released and re-elected over several decades, after scams after scams looted Indian wealth and after seeing India’s poverty raising to the third of world’ poor – it is high time, we actually listen to someone who has a plan to select right candidates and who has the power to nominate right candidates. Listen to him. Empower Rahul Gandhi! Empower him with overwhelming support!

I thank Rahul for using the word ‘System’ so many times. I sincerely hope every common Indian who had listened to the Interview heard the word as many times and understood that the system in India is fundamentally wrong.

Have questions on Rahul’s plans/ Strategies? Please send someone other than Arnab Goswami, perhaps in a show called ‘Frankly listening’ and listen to Rahul’s idea about selecting right people to run the country and about his plans on changing the system.

Now, please do not come back to me with an intellectual debate that it was Congress that started the Telangana issue and Congress had been severely scam-hit in recent years. This write-up is about all the political parties and current Indian system and about someone who has vision, power and influence to change the system. We, the people of India, have to empower him with overwhelming support that he needs. Let me be very direct and very clear. Empower Rahul with absolute majority! That is the only way the system can change. Just think about it!

Sunday 27 April 2014

User Experience

What is User Experience? The phrase can be associated with any consumer product or service. You visit a hotel for a couple of days’ stay. How was your experience? You run into a restroom in an office building/in a restaurant for nature’s call. How was your experience? You feeling sick and visiting a doctor. How was your experience? (From registration, waiting, consultation, diagnosis, billing and the aftermath) You buy a latest model mobile phone or camera. How was your experience?

For Software, the phrase UX is becoming the new paradigm. Yesteryear’s definition of good looking UI does not hold good any more. UX is not about a great looking UI for your application. It is more about making sure the application works great too. What is ‘Great’? Everything. The success of providing a great User Experience with a Software application lies in details. The App has to be Easy on the eyes; Easy to Navigate; Easy to Learn and Easy to Use.

Let us analyse a story of a typical Software Application. Finance department of a retail giant, requires all the store managers in the chain to prepare and submit a monthly budget for the store to plan the financial needs of stores for every month. The CFO calls the CIO and tells him he needs the Budget App and will nominate a Point of Contact (POC) from the Finance department for all communications. CIO calls the Manager in-charge of ‘Applications for Store Managers’ and gives brief details of the request and the POC in Finance. After a plethora of meetings, discussions, reviews, approvals and demos, the software application finally gets installed for the store managers to access and prepare monthly budget.

The CFO calls CIO and thanks him and the two top guys congratulate each other and fix up a round of golf on green grass and an evening of cocktails to celebrate the success of the new system. The Grass is not always greener in the other side – The end users. By the time a Store Manager gets a printout of a monthly budget in the approved format, he would pretty much curse everyone in the world with particular attention to the programming team and the CFO. The store manager, of course, does not go to celebrate with cocktails. Instead, he hits the bar hard every night, during the budget week.

The moral of the story: The feedback for a software product/application has to be obtained from the end users of the App, who deals with the system at a transactional level day-in and day-out. Unfortunately, the voice of the customer is too feeble to reach up to the last programmer, who builds the system, due to several commercial, political and tactful reasons.

The paradigm is shifting and a lot of big software corporations are becoming user centric. There are focus groups set up for this thought process. The focus groups work relentlessly towards Usability Studies. The groups strive to represent the voice of the customer to the programmers. The Focus groups play the role of an end user and would not let an App out of the building if it fails to provide a greater UX. The report sent from the Focus Groups to the Programming Team will list the ‘Offences’ in the system, which will make the life of an end user very difficult, at least while they spent time with the system.

What do we all do herein programming community? It is really simple. There is a ton of literature available to read about UX. Also, by asking one simple question, we can change the way a system operates: “If I were to use the system for most of my work life, would I be comfortable?”

Ladies and gentlemen, the buzzword is: Intuitive. If the end user appreciates an application with the words - Intuitive and Slick, you can congratulate yourself for having built a great software application.

Tuesday 22 April 2014

Honour killing! Really?

It has been months since I had read about the Judgement in Aarushi murder case. Even today, as I sit down to write this blog, I am extremely disturbed and worried.

An investigation based on the theory of ‘Honour killing’; A Judgement based on the theory of ‘Honour killing’, in the year of 2014. I agree that we are a third world country and technology & the facilities offered to (and the processes set up for) various government departments are way inferior compared to that of developed world. That should not necessarily dictate that the quality of thoughts, actions and expressions by these departments to be very inferior and downright unacceptable.

The UP police did kill Honour of a child; The Post-Mortem team did Honour killing; The CBI did Honour killing; The Forensic team did Honour killing; The media, both ‘Print’ and ‘Telecast’ did Honour killing; The Judgement did Honour killing; Above all, the people of this country did the biggest of Honour killing – reading and watching over several years and doing nothing about it;

It is so very convenient for everyone involved, to shamelessly do this, because Aarushi is not alive. It also is extremely convenient because they can sell this theory in India. What is worse, the public wants to read more and flourish on the cheap entertainment about a bad character here, an Honour killing there and swinging couples everywhere.

 By some miraculous divine intervention, if Aarushi were to be alive today, how many of these gentlemen/ladies have the moral courage to go and stand before her and say the things they have said about her openly to the entire nation. Aarushi would apply pepper spray on them because this is an attack on her character. And Aarushi would have every right to question their character.

If an investigative agency and a court of law can convict parents of a child on Honour killing theory and circumstantial evidences, what is the sentence against CBI for killing the Honour of a child (just by wild and shady imagination) with no evidence whatsoever?

By this post, we pray along with million others for the higher courts to restore the Honour of a murdered child. Truth must prevail!

Sunday 13 April 2014

Tamil Nadu Students and 2014 Parliamentary Elections

At the outset, I would like to declare the target audience for this write-up – Tamil Nadu students. Also, though the write-up can act as general guidelines on a student’s role in any elections, would like to restrict the conversation to 2014 parliamentary elections.

Worldwide, there are several examples when Student movements brought about astounding changes. The students of various colleges and institutions in Tamil Nadu have participated in rightful and just movements before; Very well know the effect of such protests.

The time has arrived again when the students have to act upon and exercise the power they rightfully own. VOTE! During the elections, it is the opportunity and duty of the Tamil Nadu students to vote right. Three simple guidelines:
  1. Vote right.
  2.  Influence everyone in the family, friends and the community to vote right.
  3. Spread this message across the entire Tamil Nadu to bring about the change.
I am not a political advisor. I have said so several times in my earlier articles. However, if anyone has an uncertainty as to whom to vote, please read upon, for my thoughts:

What to do?
1.             All Daringly Must Knock out anti-Tamil Nadu forces
2.             All Dutifully Must Knead to decisive leadership
3.            All Dravidians (so to speak) Must Know the truth

Why to do?  Because,
1.            A national party has routed itself in the state
2.            Another national party has a comical coalition
3.            Permanent benefiters have more family issues to sort out

The student communities of the state of Tamil Nadu have a clear mandate for 2014 elections. Remember, we are electing representatives to protect the interests of Tamil Nadu. Please be prudent and prevail! Truth must triumph!

Author’s note:-

It is a deliberate attempt to delay this write-up and post 10 days prior to the elections. The author wants the message to be new and fresh in the minds of all – yet there has to be enough time to spread the message throughout the state.

It is a coincidence that the message goes out on the day of Tamil New year! Happy New year everyone! One Vote! One Leadership!

Wednesday 2 April 2014

I have a dream!

Prologue: - Hi All, I had dreamt this write-up on 02nd day of April, 2014. Currently, we have a new Prime Minister in India. Nevertheless, my dreams are still very accurate and I hope and pray that my dreams will come true!

Dreams:-

I wanted to write this post and publish on the 01st day of April. But then, I did not want this post to be read with the hint as an April fool’s joke, laughed at and as quickly dismissed from thoughts. I wanted to write this post as a collection of ‘Then There is…’

Since the writing goes on the 02nd day of April, for a good reason, the post would be a collection of ‘Then there will be…’

Then there will be a Prime Minister who would appear on National Television and announce ‘I will not allow any farmer to commit suicide in our land. Farmers, who are watching, take my direct official telephone number and call me if such a thought ever crosses your mind. We will find the cause and eliminate the cause altogether. Trust me! Farmers are the heartbeat of India and I will not allow a farmer’s heartbeat to stop by suicide. Not under my watch!’

Then there will be a Prime Minister who would NOT want to leave a legacy as ‘I have done nothing wrong!’ Rather who would want to leave a legacy as ‘I have done everything Right’ and a stronger legacy as ‘I have not allowed anyone in the government to do anything wrong’

Then there will be a Prime Minister who would NOT allow a neighboring country to mass murder hundreds of thousands of innocent citizens in the name of war against terror. Then there will be a Prime Minister who would NOT allow the same neighboring country to kill Indian fishermen on a daily basis.

Then there will be a Prime Minister who would send a direct strong command, if needed military power, against a State government to force open the rightful River Water Supply to the neighboring state where thousands of farmers die year after year due to the illogical and completely opportunistic political system.

Then there will be an unpolluted political system in our country which will not blend the corruptive measure ‘Cash for Vote’ in any level of the democracy. Then there will be chief ministers of our states with the wholesome goal towards upliftment of the nation and people of the state’s only.

Then there will be authors who will not promote underage drinking and premarital sex in every book that they write to promote sales among what is called as ‘mass’ in the country. Then there will be media as a whole that understands ‘A country is as good as its press!’

Then there will be Police, Investigative and Judiciary systems that are mindful and actually understand the meaning of justice, dignity of justice and understand the know-hows as to whom, for what and by how the justice will be carried out.

Then there will be advanced and civilized society when foreign tourists would declare that our land is the safest in the world, for women. Then there will be a day when almost all billion plus Indians can stand up and say ‘I am proud to be an Indian’! Cheers J


Friday 21 March 2014

MH370

I wanted to write this post and publish on 01st April, 2014. Two reasons why I would like to publish a week earlier:
1. Going by the current search results, the post would still remain an April fool’s joke on 01st of April. 
2. Ten days from now, as harsh as it might sound, the world will no longer be interested in MH370.

I have not searched the net for the statistical data on how many Aircraft have gone missing and found or not found, how many ships have hit the bottom of oceans and how many Aircraft have crashed. I do not seem to recollect any information from my memory other than the Sep 09th, planned Aircraft(s) crash into World Trade Centre. The same would be true for many readers.

Why? We always delve into the current hot news. For any other News to stick into our memory, the news has got to be BIG. Unless our relatives, friends or someone we know is affected, the news will be fast forgotten.

Not many details in the search procedures interest me. There is one fact about the passenger(s) mobile phones were ringing even after second or third day into the search. If, in fact, according to the accepted theory, the Aircraft had hit the bottom of an ocean then I would like to know the make and model of the mobile phones and also the service provider details. Very impressive!

As someone who used to be a frequent flyer myself, I sincerely pray and hope that the MH370 be found and all on board are still alive by some miraculous means. People alive or not, still I hope for the Aircraft to be found 1. To pay respect for the departed souls by their relatives and for honourable burials.  2. To get whatever clue towards the cause of Aircraft missing and crash, to learn and avoid such serious errors.

Before signing off, wish that I do not have to post this again on 01st of April, 2015. 

Thursday 13 March 2014

Khobragade and Aarushi

Today, I have read the news about “India welcomes US court dropping indictment against Khobragade”. India is happy to pull off what is being considered as restoring honor of an Indian citizen, to be more specific, an Indian diplomat. Well done! Congratulations! Indian government stands up strongly for one of her daughters, corrupt or not.

Am I happy reading this news? Not at all! On the contrary, I am deeply saddened. The same government did nothing to stop tarnishing of a murdered child’s honor. Aarushi! Almost every governmental organization (Police, CBI, Forensic Labs), Media and Judiciary assassinated the honor of a murdered child. The entire country allowed this to happen. The Indian government allowed this to happen. Mother India let one of her youngest daughter’s honor ripped and did not shed a tear.

When a country, with all her might, is fighting for restoring honor of a diplomat, a common man expects the same for every citizen. Now, what does a common man expect when Aarushi murder case goes for appeal in higher courts? Restore honor of a child! Even if that takes to admit that all the governmental organizations have erred, admit it! There is no shame! Rather, India will be more proud to declare to the world that, she does not mind admitting wrong-doing and looking bad by her earlier actions, if her current righteous actions make her daughters look good and make her daughters honourable!

When the government has the audacity to question and challenge a foreign country’s legal system on an arrest of one of her diplomats (probably corrupt), should the government not fight against wrongful judgement meted out to one of her innocent daughters (and, in all likelihood, guiltless parents) by the home judicial system.

All of us pray that the higher courts will do the right thing and restore the honor of a murdered child! Satyameva Jayate!

Thursday 6 March 2014

How to win Elections?

Alright! It is elections time! Every political party, regional or national, would like to make a huge presence in the winner's list when the results are out.  But, how to win elections? How to make it big?

After several years of democratic systemic procedures, it is still hazy for several political parties. The answer is quite simple - I think. Leave it to the candidates! Make them accountable! and Back them up to the tilt! Who else would put utmost efforts for the WIN?

Setup a core electoral campaign team with a campaign head! The responsibility of this team is to guide the candidates. The procedure again, is quite simple - I think. SWOT! The candidates are to prepare SWOT analysis well in advance prior to the elections and present to the campaign team.

Responsibility of the Campaign team is to learn, analyze and review the progress of SWOT on timely basis.

S - Strengths - How to enhance them and reap maximum benefits out of the Strengths
W - Weaknesses - How to reduce the impact of the Weaknesses
O - Opportunities - How to make the fullest use of the Opportunities
T - Threats - How to eliminate the threats

Any issue, big or small, will fall into any of the above four categories. The ground rule while doing the SWOT analysis is to enlist every parameter which would influence the voting, however insignificant it may seem at the time of preparation. Remember, every single vote counts!

May be I will give one small example, for instance, on Opportunities. There always have been a huge sections of office-goers, educated youth or elders and businessmen who do not turn out to vote on the day of elections. Opportunity for every political party to invite them to vote!

All the best Campaign teams! Long live Indian Democracy!
 Check out this link!

Tuesday 25 February 2014

'Meet my friends' Series:Tony

Meet Tony! Lives West Coastal and operates in western style; Likes chocolates, cars, toys (gadgets and thingamabobs), cologne and cocktails.

Tony likes to play all indoor and outdoor games. Plays Tennis, Cricket, Soccer and Shuttle. Has got the playing styles mixed and when he plays

Cricket – the ball falls within 22 yards even after a couple of bounces. The scorecard reads like 6:3, 7:6 and 4:6 in a three match Test series (innings score separated by :)

Tennis – the ball goes for a six; quite often out of the stadium. The highest individual score for Tony in a Tennis game is 30.

Soccer – the ball never touches the net. Quite often handles the ball with the hand and calls that ‘God’s hand’.

Shuttle – always reaches right in the middle of the net. Quite often takes the shuttle head on.

Most of the photographers in the local studios are flabbergasted to learn how this gentleman with fairly dark complexion looks so white in the photographs. Though his office front desk team keeps two photographs to identify Tony (One with a mustache and one with no mustache) Tony manages to unsettle the front desk by an ever changing hairstyle and grooming.

Tony Likes chocolates and cakes so much that after taking a bite, he applies a trace of cake on clothing as well. His cologne collection matches to the perfume collection in the car. Incidentally, Tony and his car will carry the same hint of a scent during weekdays and weekends. As a couple, when Tony goes to a party, his outfit would match to the same colors that of his spouse, Yellow or Purple.

Tony can draw pictures in his handheld device as well as can exhibit connoisseur’s twist in the cocktails. Tony Sings. And it is sufficient to say that the entire Villas know that Tony sings.

Tony's accessories collection is envied by all at Allianz and at the Villas. The collection of sun glasses are of primary interest for the official gossip. A few young fellows who wanted to outsmart Tony with looks have left the company. A few old and rhyming ones who cannot match his looks and who cannot afford to quit started saying admittedly 'Whatever I wear, I cannot match up to Tony's eye wear'.


Meet Tony! Lives West Coastal and operates in western style. 

Personal Space in India

Arriving into Mumbai, I did all the things a typical new-comer does. A Mumbai-Darshan, a few plates of pani puri, dahi puri and vada pavs. After a few months of travelling in the comfort of A.C. buses to commute to work, I decided to take a train ride from Vashi to CST just to feel what it is like. Holy dooly! It was a ride of my life. And I was told, later, that the train was only three fourth full. It was a Saturday and I was in my casuals with slippers on. Casuals: right choice. Slippers: wrong. Here’s a piece of travel tip I can give to train commuters in Mumbai. Wear Shoes!

After the train ride, I wanted to write a full length article on Mumbai trains. Then again, a lot had been written and an article on Mumbai trains would be the last piece of newspaper column a mumbaikar would like to read. Nevertheless, I want to talk about personal space in India. Let's take a ride!

India has a total land area of 3,287,263 square kilometers and as per the last census in 2011, has 1210 million people — a densely populated country. However, with consideration and respect for each other's personal space, we could all have our personal zones, outside the safety of our homes as well. Unfortunately, the notion of personal space is something not embraced, in our social lives.

Let us talk about a few places where a lot of people can be seen. Movie theatre! Buses! Restaurants!

Movie theatre! Hilarious things have been said and written about the queue formation to get a ticket for a movie. There are no rules! People walk on each other and there will only be a few feeble protests when someone climbs up to walk on others' shoulders to reach the box office. Lasith Malinga, a recognized toe crusher worldwide, would certainly be envious of the thousands of toe crushers in numerous movie halls in various states. It is granted that we will rub against others while trying to reach our seats. That is the designed way of moving around inside of a movie hall. If I don't want to step on others' toes or not rub against their knees, then I have to turn into a small reptile to creep up against the back of a chair and reach the allotted seat. Perhaps I have to remain as a reptile for the reminder of my stay inside the movie hall, to avoid legs and hands getting into my personal space.

Buses! In some of the city buses, even a reptile cannot creep into a safety of a seat or reach a corner to stand without rubbing against someone else. I have to be a fly; a small fly at that, to keep flying above the heads of fellow passengers. Sometimes, I may get lucky and find my own personal space inside of a bus. However, people get creative to violate the personal space. Passengers sneeze or cough out so loud without any protection and I can feel the impact on the back of my head. While getting down, I have to jump out. Delay of a second and a fellow passenger would put a hand on my shoulder and will *help* me out.

Restaurants! Any fancy and a good looking restaurant would have the smallest of a rest room facility, even in metro cities. I have to transform to an acrobatic specialist to be able to stand in the narrow space and attend to nature's call. The spacing inside of the dining hall can be classified as following, in terms of accessibility to the closest table.

1. I cannot hear the sound of cutlery from the sloppiest of an eater at next table - will have to pay an arm and a leg for such a restaurant.
2. I cannot smell the food in the next table - Still a costly outfit.
3. I can smell the food. I can hear them eat - About 15 percent of the restaurants.
4. I can reach the food from the next table without stretching my hand - About 80 percent of them.

Traffic! For the purpose of this column, let us restrict our discussion to space violations. In contemporary traffic, between two vehicles, if there is enough space for a two wheeler, an auto-rickshaw gets in between. If there is space for an auto, a car gets in between. For two wheelers and auto, the rule is to get the front wheel into an empty space available. Then, they will worry about the rest of the body of the vehicle. In the buses there are writings 'Don't stretch your hand or head outside'. In the current conditions, the writing has to really say 'Stretch your hand or head outside, if you can; and call this number to communicate your recent record to Guinness book'. Over the years, the distance between two adjacent vehicles have been reduced from a few feet to within a foot and thereon to within a few centimetres and now in millimetres.

Then there are elevators, share autos and internet browsing centres where space for one person is taken up by at least two. The irony is that I am looked upon as a creature from another planet when I respect someone else's space and provide ways and means to create space for them - in a bus, train or in a restaurant. Having tried and failed at many attempts to spread the concept, now I take it up on my own to protect self. I travel with my new outfit to escape from rubbing, pushing and nudging — a bullet proof vest, a rain coat with gloves and a helmet on. 

Saturday 15 February 2014

Left or Right

On a summer afternoon, two of us were playing a game of Ping Pong. The year and place are trivial to this discussion. I don’t know if it was after a ping or a pong, but the effect was BANG! The ball hit right on my right eye and a lot of tears left from both right and left. My challenger across the table quipped “Your right eye is not right!” Almost immediately I replied “But, my left eye is left”. Right there it was. A Pong for a Ping! Playing with what was left in my own right, I hit the ball left and right and left as a winner from the game.

All these years, whenever I write in English, I marvel at the power of the language with simple words such as Right and Left. Let us go back to the game. My challenger, a politician, was (and probably still is) a Rightist; Standing at the right side of the table, using the right techniques, playing the game right, right handed. Everything about him was Right. At the end of the game, having lost the game, he was left with a wry smile when I called him a left wing politician, directionally.

I am a Righty; not a Rightist. In Tennis, I like a righty who plays lefty. In music also, I like a righty who plays lefty. I am not sure if the lefties are left-brained and the righties are right-brained. Suddenly, I feel the fun element from the two words is missing in our dialogue. Let us bring in fictitious characters: Joe Right and John Left. Obviously, they both are Americans.

Joe Right and John Left have been friends since school days. Let us pick a super-bowl evening for the narration. Right and Left settled in front of the television at a friend’s place, with the super-bowl ritual of burgers, bites and a case of beers. The action-packed game had it all: Touch-downs, Field goals and striking passes. Joe and John got high and started a mini ballgame, right there in the hall. They were anything but upright and totally uptight. A pass from Joe hit the ceiling and bounced a couple of times, breaking the loosely fit coffee table in both sides. There was a lame joke from Joe on something about a coffee break or needing a coffee break which John summarily dismissed and disapproved of.

The game and the beer got over.  The reality sunk in. Joe and John, always team men, split the work half and half. They made an agreement that the table would be fixed prior to both leaving for their respective homes.  Joe would fix the right side of the table and John would fix whatever was left. Right, a loner, lived left and left alone. Left lived right and in his mind at least, lived right.

When the pact came to fixing the coffee table, Joe Right did the right and left. John Left left in a hurry without keeping his part of the bargain. So, on that very occasion, Right right right right, left and turned left and Left left left, left and turned right. Cheers J